Subtle Bluntness

So, Zombieland.  I got to see it this weekend and, in a word:  awesome.  In two words?  Fucking awesome.  It was this weekend’s big hit and nobody I know who saw it has a bad word to say about it.  Check their blogs and see if you don’t believe me. (And if you don’t buy into what I have to say by now, then why are you reading this?  You can disagree, but they haven’t bought my soul or my reviewing pen.  Yet.  Call me, Hollywood!  We’ll talk!)

Kind of disappointed I didn’t get a chocolate ear, but that’s what I get for going to the last showing on Sunday rather than the midnight screening.  In spite of everything, the theater was PACKED at 10 PM on Sunday, and I’m planning on going back again next weekend with my dad.  Good times, people.  Really good times.

I’m digging The Creepshow quite a bit.  Something about their combination of rockabilly, doo-wop backing vocals, horror movie imagery, and general awesomeness is hitting all my spots.  It’s Halloween 24/7/365 here at SB for you new kids on the block.

I’ve been on a serious horror kick lately anyway.  I’ve reread The Rising and City of the Dead, and I picked up Dead Sea and The Conqueror Worms (all by Brian Keene, the best new horror writer around).  I’ve also reread some of my collected issues of The Walking Dead from Image Comics/Robert Kirkman and David Wellington’s Monster Island (which you can read free online but don’t be cheap; buy a copy because this kind of thing needs to be encouraged).

All of these save The Conqueror Worms are zombie novels.  The Conqueror Worms involves a world-ending flood, giant monsters, and (of course) worms.  Hence the second song (also from The Creepshow).

Happy Rebirthday, Jesus!

(Sorry, Christians.)

I mentioned it in passing yesterday, but it’s been published now, so you can read the article (that was supposed to be a blog post) but turned into its own giant treatise on the potential for a zombie MMORPG.

Long story short, I think that the time for a zombie MMORPG is, well, now.  Between XBox Live, the PlayStation Network, the Wii’s online capability, and general availability of high speed Internet, people have never been this interested in playing games online before.  If you can strike while the iron is hot, look outside the high fantasy and science-fiction genres, and attach a marketable name (Resident Evil) to whatever zombie MMO you’ve got, you can reach a whole lot of people.

Author’s note:  My lack of focus is apparent even in that article.  This is how my mind works.  I can’t contain it, let alone stop it.  May as well just run with it.

The incredible zombie romance webcomic Raising Hell is coming back for Season 2, starting this Halloween!  In case you missed it in February when I ranted and raved just how awesome this mix of zombies, punk rock, and romance was, you’ve got plenty of time to catch up before the second go-around comes around.  Really, this was probably the best webcomic I read last year, and Andy B is a certified goddamn genius.

I really think all you guys (especially certain folks) would appreciate this series.  I can’t recommend it enough.  Click here to start at the beginning and read all the way through.  If it’s going to be like last time, it’ll update every Friday until the story is done, so subscribe to it via RSS or check back here every week to follow along with me.

I need somebody to talk to about it other than Jade, so help me out here!

I was going to do a legitimate post, but while I’m working on that, have a video of a zombie outbreak instead. I could complain about how real zombies don’t have heat signatures, but that would take away from how good the video is despite the logical inconsistencies. Then again, as anyone could tell you, I’m something of a pedant about my zombie attack videos. So instead of complaining, I’ll tell a Yakov Smirnoff joke.

In America, you eat the flesh of the dead. In Soviet Russia, the dead eat you!

So, thanks to the great and wonderful Jade, who is always looking out for me, I’ve discovered what is probably the best webcomic I’ve ever read. It’s called Raising Hell. It’s as good as anything on the comic book store shelves right now, if not better because it usually comes out on time, and… yeah, go check it out.

It hits all my spots. There’s punk rock, zombies, romance, a redheaded sexpot heroine, violence, binge drinking, zombies, a house party, a reference to House Party, comedy, and of course, ZOMBIES! WHY ARE YOU STILL READING THIS?! GO GO GO! You’re missing out! If any of this stuff even remotely appeals to you, then you’ll thank me. Even if you don’t like this stuff, check it out anyway.

Brilliant. Totally brilliant.

Hey gang. I know I got tagged for a meme awhile back, and I’ll get to that eventually. Until then, allow me to expand your mind a bit by reminding you of some brilliant pop culture stuff that you missed the first time around.

First of all, for fans of The Groundlings, there’s the brilliant Night Stand, and my Cultelevision take on said program. Sadly, no one else remembers this show but me, but that’s okay. Most people have awful taste in TV anyway, and the important thing is I liked the show. It’s a hilarious spoof of daytime talk shows, and as daytime shows get weirder and weirder, Night Stand has never seen more dead-on.

Secondly, for the gaming dorks, we’ve got two entries. I’ve written about Second Life before, but now there’s actually something to do IN Second Life thanks to the surprisingly fun despite the shitty Linden grid, I Am Legend: Survivor. It’s survival horror meets third-person shooter, and it’s probably the closest thing we’ll ever get to the zombie-themed MMO I’ve always wanted.

In other things I’m craving MMO versions of, we’ve got my favorite computer RPG of all time, the innovative and deep Fallout. Man, I love this game; even to this day, it’s on my hard drive and I still fire it up from time to time. Not only are they working on Fallout 3 as we speak, they’re also working on a Fallout MMO! Huzzah! (now let’s hope they actually finish the damn thing!)

Other than writing like 6 things this week, I haven’t done a damn thing.

A brief update on this chilly and haunted Halloween night. I’ve been busy over at Den of Geek the last week, and here’s a little update of what I’ve been doing yonder for those still in the Halloween spirit (and also fans of The Office).

The Office 4.05: Local Ad. Limitless paper in a paperless world.

My review of 30 Days of Night. I fucked up in the review, and nobody fixed it. Danny Huston as Marlowe is the lead vampire; Mark Boone Jr. played beefy loner Beau. Don’t tase me, bro.

My defense of Night of the Living Dead (1990) as an underappreciated horror film. No one agrees with me, but really; it’s not a bad movie and updates the original quite nicely in my opinion.

And, of course, Den of Geek Loves Bruce Campbell, just for Newscoma.

I also saw my second Christmas commercial today, this one featuring the characters from Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer, no less! In an advertising break from HALLOWEEN on AMC! What in the hell is going on here?!

Proposed (Classified) Bill Will Defend Against Flesh-Eating (Classified)

Rep. John Haller (R-PA) introduces a bill that will allocate (classified) dollars over the next (classified) years to fight flesh-eating (classified).