Subtle Bluntness

I’ve decided that Michael C. Hall is completely incapable of acting in any role where the character is supposed to be a heterosexual.  Every role I’ve seen him in, from David Fisher to Dexter to Ken Castle in Gamer, comes across as the character being gay, even if the character isn’t supposed to be gay.  [...]

Okay, so maybe 7 didn’t eat 9, but I did go see 9, the new animated sci-fi stitchpunk post-apocalyptic action-thriller adjectives-filled feast for the eyes from executive producers Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov.  Oh, also director/writer/animator Shane Acker, but nobody knows who he is so let’s mention the people involved with paying for the movie [...]

Well, I saw Halloween II last weekend, and I had quite a bit to say about it.  You can check out my official review here, if you are so inclined. For once, I don’t have anything I feel compelled to add to the official review in my writer’s commentary within the self-promotional blog post.  It’s [...]

Well, I saw The Goods this weekend.  Basically, it’s another starmaking vehicle for Jeremy Piven (who already had one in the underrated PCU) where he plays a guy who… well, let’s be honest here.  Jeremy Piven is basically playing Jeremy Piven here.  Or some version of Jeremy Piven, at least.  Here’s the review, for those [...]

Gonna do something a little different today, gang.  I wrote a nice review of Funny People for Den of Geek (number one at the box office, and number one in our hearts), but not only was it a little long, it was a little inappropriate for the audience involved.  Mostly because people couldn’t care less [...]

I reviewed Orphan for Den of Geek this weekend.  In the process of writing about the disappointing film, I stumbled across a vaguely interesting question.  What’s better for a movie? To start off legitimately interesting and to devolve into a series of dumb clichés, or to just be a series of dumb clichés without teasing [...]

I saw Year One last weekend.  Not many other people did.  The crowd was sparse, as were the laughs. Here’s the review. It’s hard to believe Jack Black has gone from High Fidelity and Tenacious D to doing dreck like this.  It’s even harder to believe that Harold Ramis was associated with the project (though [...]

So I went to see Up this weekend.  It’s the #1 movie at the box office this weekend (because it’s a Pixar film) and as I said in my review, it’s a wonderful movie (because it’s a Pixar film).  If you have anything even remotely close to a romantic bone in your body, bring tissues [...]

So, Twitter is going to be joining forces with Reveille Productions and Brillstein Entertainment Partners for a television show.  And yes, it’s going to be as bad as you first assumed when I mentioned Twitter TV:  It’s going to be a celebrity stalking reality gameshow. I will now go exfoliate with a belt sander. I [...]

Somehow, I’ve become Den of Geek’s version of Andy Rooney.  For those of you who aren’t total nerds and who aren’t 1,000 years old (and regular viewers of 60 Minutes), Andy Rooney is this bitter old man who gets on TV despite being in the throes of pants-shitting senility and rants and raves about how [...]