Subtle Bluntness

Well, I saw The Goods this weekend.  Basically, it’s another starmaking vehicle for Jeremy Piven (who already had one in the underrated PCU) where he plays a guy who… well, let’s be honest here.  Jeremy Piven is basically playing Jeremy Piven here.  Or some version of Jeremy Piven, at least.  Here’s the review, for those [...]

So that happened.  Tyler Perry’s Tyler Perry’s Madea Goes to Jail made $41 million dollars this weekend.  In turn, I jammed a salad fork into the bottom of my foot. In less unpleasant news, I got to review I Love The 80’s:  The Naked Gun and Choke:  Special Edition for various places.  I love it [...]

I don’t think I’ve ever gone into a movie, watched it, and come out with this thought: “That movie could’ve used the soothing directorial touch of Uwe Boll.” Then again, this is the first time I’ve ever seen a film as potentially ludicrous as Max Payne refuse to embrace the brain-searing incomprehensibility of its stated [...]

Dear Kiefer, I just saw Mirrors this week. Here’s my review, if you’re interested. I’ll give you some time to have your personal assistant read it to you. Okay, are you done? Good, good. Let’s continue. Listen, Kief… can I call you Kief? Too bad. Anyway, Kief, you’re on a hit TV show where you [...]

You guys have no idea how proud I am of my half-brother Seth Rogen today. Last night I went to see his new movie, Pineapple Express, and I really enjoyed it. I consider it a knowing birthday present to me, and it was very nice of him. Sure he doesn’t call as much as I’d [...]

Welcome to a sick and twisted future, where gold is worthless (because of the mountain of it they found in Antarctica) and the world economies have been destroyed, shattering nations into hundreds of nation states and putting evil people like the Governor of California at odds with even more ruthless and evil people like the [...]