Subtle Bluntness

Blame my blogless friend Andrew for this gem. Before the final match, the Norwegian wrestling coach came to Ole and said, “Now, don’t forget all the research we’ve done on this Russian. He’s never lost a match because of this ‘pretzel’ hold he has”. Whatever you do, do not let him get you in that [...]

From Attack of the Show via io9, here’s Rob Zombie’s Where The Wild Things Are.  I have to say, it looks like my kind of kaiju movie!  Anything involving the Wild Things bathing in blood I’m in favor of.

So, Zombieland.  I got to see it this weekend and, in a word:  awesome.  In two words?  Fucking awesome.  It was this weekend’s big hit and nobody I know who saw it has a bad word to say about it.  Check their blogs and see if you don’t believe me. (And if you don’t buy [...]

Gonna do something a little different today, gang.  I wrote a nice review of Funny People for Den of Geek (number one at the box office, and number one in our hearts), but not only was it a little long, it was a little inappropriate for the audience involved.  Mostly because people couldn’t care less [...]

So Farrah Fawcett died and went to heaven.  God asked her, “You can have one wish, what would you like done on earth?” She says, “Save the suffering children.” So God kills Michael Jackson. Author’s Note: No, I didn’t write this one, but it was sent to me.  Yes, I know it’s bad.

So the swine flu is coming to kill you and rape your pets.  Now you can either go read what the government and science has to say about our latest super disease and either be scared out of your wits or you can go read a list of things I’ve learned about virus outbreaks from [...]

This is hilarious.  I’m just glad I’m a professional, so New Batman doesn’t yell at me.

So people send me DVDs.  I write reviews of them and link to them.  People read them and tell me I suck or that I am awesome.  If they tell me I’m awesome, I know they’re smart and handsome people.  If they tell me I suck, I know that they should probably be issued helmets [...]

The SportsBastards BastardCast Episode 5 is up and ready for your ears.  This week, find out about just how bad of an idea it is to have prunes and coffee for breakfast, the defensive coordinator for Team Mexico during the upcoming race war, staph infections and the epic fail that is the Cleveland Browns janitorial [...]

Who was Rudy Ray Moore?  Well, I’ll let the man himself tell you. You can read my tribute at that link up there, but I don’t think anyone can pay homage to Dolemite moreso than the human blaxploitation parody (and my favorite rapper of all time), Ol’ Dirty Bastard.  Take it away, Big Baby Jesus: