Over the coffee pot for the last few days, there has been a poster.  The four Beatles stare at me at least three times a day as I’m back and forth to fill my cup full of awake juice.  As the drawn eyes leered at me yet again, I made a comment to a coworker.

Now with extra-creepy moustaches!

“The band that wins this thing needs to go all out.  On their way off the stage, one of them needs to be shot, one of them needs to be stabbed, and one of them needs to have all his money stolen by a one-legged bitch.”

As for the last one?  Just like in real life, his punishment is to be stuck as Ringo Starr forever.

I got to watch and review the Simon Pegg vehicle How To Lose Friends and Alienate People for Kiwibox.  Go check it out.  If you’re one of the five people who’ve seen the movie, lemme know what you thought.  I’ll get the box of drool bibs open, just in case.

I think one of the things I appreciated most about the movie is how anybody who has ever been paid to do something they love could watch it and either remember when they made that big scary decision to stop fucking around and just either sink or swim or hope that one day they’ll get that call up to the big leagues of whateverdom.

I know a guy who moved to California to wait tablesbe a screenwriter.   Do I think he’s crazy for doing it?  Yeah, kind of.  Do I hope he becomes the next Judd Apatow so I can use my connection with him to launch my own series of mediocre horror films of consistently declining quality?  Totally.  Would I be able to do something that gutsy on my own?  No, probably not.

Hell, in the movie Sidney Young (and in real life Toby Young) started a magazine, then dumped that magazine to go write for Sharps (Vanity Fair).  I, uh… started some websites and, when I was at a point where I could either get busy working for myself or dial it back and keep my day job, chose to keep my day job.  It was probably the best decision at the time, given that I was tired of the freelance job that was paying me best and I could see the writing on the wall that it was going to come to an end sooner, rather than later.

If I had held on, could I have used it to get somewhere else?  Probably.  But it wasn’t exactly what I wanted to do.  I want to write, not be a marketing-bot with a personality.

There’s another opportunity (with a profitable website conglomerate that I shant mention) that I missed out on because of my day job.  I would’ve loved to have had that writing and editing, as it is exactly what I want (and what I’m doing for myself and as a freelancer anyway).  Would it still be there now?  That I don’t know.  It was a temporary position for six months and only about 30 hours a week at that; it either could have taken off or I might have been looking for a new job by now.

If I had known then what I know now, I would’ve given up the day job in a heartbeat.  Even this gig, as secure and permanent as it seemed, isn’t terribly secure anymore.  My freelance stuff is getting better and better, and I’m kind of getting the itch to push it and see how far it might take me.  I’ll take six months and 30 hours a week of something with a potential future over a full-time semi-guarantee of something that’s wasting my time, life, and talent.

A MicroMart freelance contribution
The Weekend Box Office Report
My Bloody Valentine 3-D Review
A Howling Good Time:  Five Great Werewolf Movies
Nerd Rage:  Keanu Reeves Set For Cowboy Bebop Movie

I still have a few more things to do this week, and there’s always my daily posting schedule at Shaktronics and random several times weekly posting at PopFi to continue working on.  Considering PopFi’s numbers nose-dived last week thanks to my distractibility and general laziness, I’m going to be posting at that site frequently this week to try and make up the 700 uniques per day dip the site suffered over the last seven days.

I blame the holiday and the inauguration.  People weren’t at work, so they weren’t surfing the Internet like they should.  On inauguration day, the tubes were so clogged it wasn’t funny, so that probably hurt the site some too.  My last few posts haven’t been the greatest in weirdness either, thanks to a general bankruptcy of ideas, so cross your fingers I can turn it around.

Either way, they get DVDs in for reviewing purposes, and after cashing in some more of my connections, I’ll be doing the occasional DVD review over there.  For example, I’ve got two reviews that went up today on wildly different subjects.  One of them is a movie from one of the most popular anime in the world, Naruto the Movie 3:  Guardians of the Crystal Kingdom.

The other is also wildly popular, but it’s something that’s passed the test of time.  It’s the original version of the remake I’ve already panned:  The Day the Earth Stood Still.  That’s right, it’s a 2 disc special edition of the 1951 classic, and it’s a really good one with lots of special features for sci-fi dorks like me.

Anyway, go check it out.  As usual, I’ll promote all the stuff I do over there here, so you can click through and eyeball it, but there’s a lot of other great content from people not me.  I don’t think it’ll be as often as I post at Den of Geek, but you can never tell with me.  So long as they keep making with the DVDs to review, I’ll stay busy.  Of course, I’ve been busy this whole time, but you get the point.

Click here to view the embedded video.

I’m not sure this is a happy song, but it’s got kind of the defiant spirit that I think you need to take the work day beating of a job  you hate day after day after day.  You know the kind.  Someone tells you to do something fucking stupid and pointless, so you smile and nod, a little part of you dies, and you think to yourself:  “Fuck you, you’re worthless.  All you do is suck up and make my job harder while trying to make yourself not as expendable as everyone else.  Eat shit and fucking die.”

They might think they’re better than you because they make more money or have a title, but they’re not.  I know it, and you should know it too.  You guys are awesome.

Especially Ginger, because she’s the ringmaster of the FGF circus and digs up all the links for people who are too lazy to do it (like me).

Also, Monday I continued the Musical Monday kick by posting the new Weezer video, Pork and Beans, over at Shaktronics. Imagine my surprise when I get an email forwarded to me from the company behind the video, Motion Theory, thanking me for spreading the word and even answering some of the questions I had! You know, with so much information out there on the Internet, it’s staggering to think that you might actually be noticed by the people you’re talking about. While my blog isn’t exactly a celebrity hangout like NewsComa‘s crib, I should be nicer to Steven Seagal, just in case he really would like to punch me in the crotch for my mocking love.

I think I’ll celebrate my good fortune by buying this Smaug ashtray. I don’t smoke, but I do like awesome stuff. And dragons. And random links.

I don’t want to.

I wish I was in elementary school again so I could just enjoy the snow and not have to go to work. Snow isn’t supposed to mean leaving the house early and praying you don’t die on some godforsaken interstate because you’ve already been hit by a semi once when driving in the dark while it was snowing. Snow’s supposed to mean putting on my big heavy boots and gloves and going outside to throw snowballs, or make a snowman, or scoop up the top layer of the fluffy white stuff and make snow crème.

This is the best kind of snow, fluffy and wet. It sticks together in perfect snowball clumps that burst in a shower of white powder when they hit something. Everything looks so clean and beautiful outside, with the layer of whiteness reflecting the moonlight and brightening the evening skies to gray instead of pitch.

I shouldn’t have to dread this. It’s a thrilling experience; my inner child is screaming at me, “Call into work! Go outside and roll around on the lawn like a dog! Doitdoitdoit!” I guess there’s a reason I’ve been listening to that band of eternal teenagers, The Ramones, all day long.

Click here to view the embedded video.

I don’t wanna grow up.

Click here to view the embedded video.

The only time I’ve ever heard a Trans-Siberian Orchestra song on TV, it’s been in that Miller Lite commercial that we’ve all seen a million times. You know the one: the house with all the Christmas lights, synchronized to the bombastic strains of “Wizards in Winter” from the album The Lost Christmas Eve. Surely, the guy who first did this, and TSO, have to be making a mint off the commercial, which is a yearly tradition on par with “A Christmas Story.”

Well, Newscoma‘s found some footage of someone, in her very own Hooterville, who has synchronized their Christmas lights to a song that ISN’T that overused song. Go check it out!

Author’s note: The originator of this phenomenon is a guy named Carson Williams, and since his house took off and became an internet and advertising sensation, he’s started doing Christmas light and music shows professionally. HOW COOL IS THAT?!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: El Oh El. Lrn2Proofread. This is quite possibly the least comprehensible job posting I’ve ever seen, and I’ve applied for government jobs!